Little did you know that the number one device on the planet your cellphone is slowly killing you. Why is it killing you? why would anybody create a device that emits microwaves that literally cook your brain? I blame the Illuminati.

Forget the cellphones how hot is Anderson Cooper?

Ok Ok stay on the topic at hand. So how long did it take before anybody realized this? "Oh yea Bob I forgot to tell you, your cellphone emits a small microwave that cooks your brain". WTF!

So the best thing to do would be to get an earpiece right? NOPE! Even your little earpiece emits a lil bit of the Cancerous wave.

So now what? Whats the solution? Do we have to go back to writing letters on actual paper!? How will I update my facebook? Will twitter use pigeons for updates? Anderson Cooper please saves us!

It may cause Cancer, but will it Blend?