Meet Michigan’s Next Frozen Enemy: Winter Storm Kadence

Brace yourself, fellow Michigander. The Weather Channel just dropped its 2025-26 list of winter storm names, and honestly, it reads like a roll call for a suburban high school talent show: Alston, Bellamy, Chan, Devin...and yes, Wolfgang. Nothing says "I just turned your driveway into an ice-covered skating rink" like Wolfgang.

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Why Name Michigan's Winter Storms?

Now, you might be asking, "Why name a storm?" Simple — so you know which one to swear at while you're sliding into a ditch during your morning commute. The Weather Channel says it's to "help people stay informed." Sure. But let's be real — it's way easier to text your friends, "Stuck in traffic because of stupid Winter Storm Nell," than "Stuck in traffic due to a low-pressure system originating from Alberta."

Since 2012, these names have been helping Michiganders track storms — and assign blame — with surgical precision. When you're outside scraping your windshield in -10°, it's comforting to mutter, "Thanks a lot, Maizie." It's personal, it's emotional, and it's cathartic.

The 2025-26 name roster: from Alston to Zeb

And this season's lineup? It's a doozy. Somewhere between Gianna and Quigley, Michigan will get hit with something heavy, frozen, and wildly inconvenient. But now, thanks to The Weather Channel's noble naming crusade, you'll know exactly whose name to curse while you shovel your driveway for the third time that day.

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So, get your mittens ready and vocabulary of creative insults refreshed — because Winter Storm Tyrese isn't just coming, he's parking himself over I-96 until April. Here's a look at all 26 names chosen for this year's winter storms in Michigan:

• Alston

• Bellamy

• Chan

• Devin

• Ezra

• Fern

• Gianna

• Hernando

• Iona

• Joseline

• Kadence

• Louise

• Maizie

• Nell

• Obie

• Peyton

• Quigley

• Rodrigo

• Santiago

• Tyrese

• Ulma

• Viviana

• Wolfgang

• Ximena

• Yashi

• Zeb