What Homesick Candles for Michigan Cities Would Smell Like [PHOTOS]
Homesick Candles are meant to comfort displaced homebodies by smelling like the state from which they came. We decided a custom line of fragrances that smell like beloved Michigan hometowns and cities was way more interesting -- so we made some.
Homesick Candles are actually the start of a really great idea. For those Michiganders who've had to move away from their beloved home state for any multitude of reasons, I'm sure there is something comforting about burning a candle "with scents reminiscent of indian summers, cherries, and chocolate." Not because any place in Michigan actually has those smells, but more because cherries make you think of that time you went to the Traverse City Cherry Festival and got so drunk on heavy ass Michigan Beers that you puked into a storm drain... or something like that.
When you remove obvious questions like "WTF does an indian summer smell like anyway?" and "How is chocolate a Michigan smell? Is it because I ate chocolate there before?" -- you have to admit the idea is kind of sweet, but is it specific enough? Every city in in Michigan has its own distinct fragrance, which instantly causes the memories you made there to come flooding back in. So, in the spirit of expanding on a good idea, we present you with our own custom line of Michigan City Homesick Candles. Look for them in stores and online never.
The faint aroma of gunpowder brings back all those sleepless nights you spent unwillingly playing "gun shots or fireworks," while the faint aroma of motor oil will take you back to a time when we had industry. Finally, a splash Flint Coney sauce essence adds the body odor-esque finish that is undeniably Flint, Michigan.
Be magically whisked back to Grand Blanc with this candle that smells like its s**t doesn't stink, just like yours didn't when you lived there. (Note: Candle actually does smell like s***)
The smell of weed will remind you of the employees on break in the parking lot of the Court Street Walmart, and the fragrant aroma of rotisserie chicken brings to mind that time you saw two girls in pajama pants fighting over the last cold rotisserie chicken in the deli section of said Walmart. The final ingredient, a hint of fresh asphalt being shoveled into a pothole, makes this candle the most Burton thing ever.
Davison ***NEW FOR CHRISTMAS 2017***
Just in time for the holidays, our new Davison candle brings the gentle scent of deer carcasses rotting just downwind on Madden's buck pole, the neverending stench of crude oil from that semi that blew up near the I-69 on-ramp at Irish Road nearly 4 years ago, and an overpowering amount of Abercrombie cologne from the all the kids that drench themselves in it so they don't smell like they're from Davison (we still know).
Lapeer smells like crystal meth and horse poop, so does this candle.
An artisinal scent, hand-crafted with organic cherries and grapes, freshly-harvested hops, reclaimed lumber, and just a touch of patchouli oil encased in a hand-blown glass receptacle made from melted down Mason Jars by a suspender-wearing 29-year old mixologist that has a handlebar mustache. This candle is only sold in stores that have "shoppe" at the end of their name.
The Great Value version of the Traverse City candle.
There's one section in the middle of the candle that smells really great and inviting, while everything surrounding it smells homeless and terrifying.
Don't Be Mad
I'm just making jokes. I actually love all of the places on the list, so I don't feel too bad about poking fun at them. Don't let me have all the fun though, send us your ideas for Michigan city-scented candles in the comments below or on Facebook.